Silly Army Sunday 29th May

It was a small but fun gathering of members at The Silly Army last Sunday, the grey, overcast weather and the bank holiday perhaps contributing factors. However, there were still enough players for plenty of silly games.

Tennis. A gentleman's game.

After Pete and Dave played a gentlemanly game of tennis while the troops practised their hockey shooting, it was time for a game of Hockey proper. The management of Dave, Pete and Kaye, along with Alex M, took on the yellow team of Steph, Duncan, Matt and Helen. While the wonky fingered keeper in the red goal made several valiant saves and Alex was all over the pitch, the addition of the two old men on the team made it somewhat unevenly matched (particularly as Pete frequently forgot how to move and Dave was clinically dead at least twice, but still kept playing. . . )

The yellow team were working better as a unit rather than relying on one plucky player out in the field, and so they quickly took the lead and the game.

We attempted to play ‘Proper’ football after a while but gave up quite quickly as it was a bit too scary. Much enjoyment came from the grunting and football chav impersonations, however. Erik joined us during this time and was one of the few who could actually play footie. The score at 3-1 and nobody sure who was on which team, we abandoned this game in favour of Sticky Ball.

The yellow team played as a unit.

This time we mixed the old men up a bit (that is, put one on each side) and this seemed to work, as the yellows stormed the first game and the blues took the second (although the strong wind may have had something to do with this). “Mrs Machine” in particular was a star for the blue team. It was, however, the yellows who took the third for the match, although there was just one ball in it. Special commendation to Lauren for turning up with cakes during the game!

Next up we had som e Tchouckball, which was a tricky game on a big pitch with so few players. Again it was tight but the yellow team edged it with some good partnerships between the Machine, Steph, Kaye and Pete.

We were going to play some Kubb for the remainder of the afternoon, but Erik, Pete and Matt became a little too absorbed in a Lego Star Wars sticker album and began covering all toys, cars and anything that moved in stickers…

Come join The Silly Army in King’s Park, Bournemouth, from 7pm on Wednesday evenings and 1pm on Sunday afternoons for fun and games of a silly nature. It’s free, a charity and open to anyone aged 18 and over.

Snow stopping Silly Army! December games report

You could be forgiven for thinking The Silly Army sports and games club haven’t been up to much over the past few weeks due to the lack of blogging – but you’d be wrong. It’s been a busy few weeks indeed, hence the slow progress in reporting games activity. But we’ve still been out and about in the field and the YMCA Hall. Here is what we’ve been getting up to…

Sunday the 5th of December almost saw the most shocking defeat in the history of the Silly Army (even worse than the 21-0 Combi Ball fiasco) when Big Tennis came close to being a 21-0 defeat for the team featuring all three Silly Army committee members.

The ice man cometh...

Appallingly bad whacking from K, Pete and Dave (largely going backwards, sideways, upwards and indeed anywhere apart from over the net) and a few co-conspirators saw Steph’s team comprehensively wipe the floor with their opposition. The committee team did claw a few points back before skulking off with their tails between their legs to play Hockey.

There’s an unwritten rule at Silly Army that the colder the weather, the longer the Hockey match will be. That certainly played out this week as the toe-chillingly cold weather saw a very, very lengthy game indeed.

It was a well balanced game however, going to 4-4 before the red team eventually chipped the winning goal past yellow keeper K.

After a muddy, slippery game of Dodgeball, it was time for a slightly controversial game of Sticky Ball. The yellow team won the first game but the blues came back for the second. As players began to drift away, it was the blue team who kept their eyes on the ball for the final match to win 2-1.

As the light began to fade, there was just time for a game of Monkey Toss in which Alex’s team dunked the opposition.

Dave, dressed for the occasion.

Sunday 12th December saw the return of some old faces. Tim, on his apparently annual visit, fitted straight into the Big Tennis match and was soon filling in for the much missed Terminator giving Pete abuse.

Occasional guest London Dave dropped in too, but despite this combination Steph’s team won Big Tennis.

Hockey was a very close game and it was decided to play to 10 instead of 5. First the reds led 5-0 and it was decided to swap ends. The yellows came back and scored five in reply to take the score to 5-5 with all ten goals scored in the same end.

We swapped ends again and the yellows took the lead 8-6, despite Chris trying to confuse everyone by making up the score for his red team. The score went to 9-9 and the reds eventually won with an amazing goal from Tim.

Next we played Dodgeball, the yellows being all over the blues for the first game and the blues coming back for the second to take it to one a piece. But swift shooting from the yellows meant they won 2-1.

The Silly Army playing in the snow.

It’s been a long time since we played Randomiser, but that’s what we did next, bouncing a ball randomly off trampolines and the dodgeball, attempting to make the other team miss. There was much confusion as to what the actual score was after we ran out of fingers to count it on; we think Pete’s team won, but we’re really not sure.

Another game we haven’t played for a while, Space Invaders (the original version) came next. The object is to knock either one eyed or two eyed monsters, in the shape of traffic cones, off posts with a ball. The yellow team proved best at this, quickly demolishing the one-eyed monsters.

The yellow team also took victory in Tchoukball, possibly because they could see each other’s bibs better as it was getting rather dark by then.

Football in the snow.

On the 19th the ground was coated in ice and snow, but that was no deterrent to The Silly Army, who came out to play in surprising force.

Fresh snow fell as we set up, which meant  the first game of the day was snowball fighting – largely an excuse to throw snow at Dave.

We took to the pitch to play Snow Football, giving Pete the chance to demonstrate why he’s being called up for the England Squad with his spectacular open goal miss.

It was the blue team who eventually won this slippery game. After slippy Dodgeball, we played Sticky Ball, the yellows finding their ice shoes to win a comprehensive victory.

Impossiball proved a great game on ice as we skated around the pitch, the yellows again sliding their way to victory.

Impossiball on ice is rather entertaining.

Then it was time for icy Hockey, where despite freezing toes the yellow team beat the reds 5-4.

All too soon it was time to slip slide home.

The Silly Army would like to wish all our members and readers a Merry Christmas. We’ll be out to play on Boxind Day from 1pm.

Another sunny Sunday Silly session!

The Silly Army last Sunday.

Despite being described by some nay-sayers at Bournemouth Council as an “underused resource”, King’s Park was again busy on Sunday afternoon as footballers, cyclists, dog walkers, families and runners made the best of the gloriously crisp, sunny day to enjoy the benefits of spending time in green space.

Big Tennis - by far the best way to start a Sunday afternoon in King's Park.

In their new spot in the far corner, The Silly Army were of course out in force, and it was super to see lots of new players as well as many familiar faces. Welcome, Alex, Nick, Matt, Sue and Visiting John – we hope you’ll come and play with us some more!

As has become a tradition with Silly Army, we started our park games session with a game of Big Tennis. The new players all took to this game surprisingly well, quickly showing some of the old hands how it should be done. Due to various late night games, drinking sessions and emergency 1am peppermint tea deliveries, some of the old guard were a little off the ball, and the ball itself was quite frequently off the court as we whacked it here, there and everywhere. However, some good rallies were eventually had, and Karen’s team were the most alert to claim a deserved victory.

Dave proves he has the legs for a netball skirt.

First up on the big pitch was Double Netball, a recently invented game with two very high, very small netball hoops in which you have to toss your balls.

This is a fast game that soon had everybody warmed up in the chilly air. This is a game where the girls tend to excel – Helen in particular an excellent shooter – but the boys proved they were just as comfortable in netball skirts (well, according to what we’ve heard about some of them…) and a tight, frantic game ensued, eventually won by the blue team.

While Dave organised a game of dodgeball, Mrs Doyle’s tea shop opened early – but not for the usual reason of a well-earned tea break. Oh no, the next game was one that hadn’t been played for a while and was new to many of the more recent Silly Army members.

English Football is truly the Beautiful Game. It’s played the way football was intended to be played – with a cup of tea, a saucer and a strategically placed biscuit. The object of the game is to score standard football goals, without spilling your tea or getting a soggy biscuit. Cue lots of mincing as players attempt to keep up with the ball without losing any of the precious brown stuff.

Viv was spectacularly fouled as the ball knocked her cup and saucer clean out of her hand, while Pete played by the book and gained some advantages – drinking his tea, getting a refill and eating not just his own but other team members’ biscuits.

English Football also requires that each player carries an Excuse Me card, which can be presented once to an opposition player, who must oblige by stepping aside. However, not many of the Sillies played this card to their advantage, too focused on keeping their saucers clean. Despite having tea junkies Pete and K on their team, the blue team lost out to the yellows.

There's something wrong with this football game... That's right, everyone needs a nice cup of tea!

Tea was not required for an evenly matched game of hockey, where K’s late night peppermint antics saw her being not particularly on form in the yellow goal. Both the red and yellow strike forces were on good form, though, and K eventually woke up enough to defend in golden goal time by kneeling on the ball, not in the slightest intimidated by Pete’s (joking?!) threat to put leg and ball in the goal. The yellow team struck gold soon after and won the game.

Sticky Ball came next and was again quite evenly matched. The yellows got off to a great start but it was the blues who played better and won the game.

After tea break proper, we played Tchoukball and here the yellow team started off playing far better. Steph, Karen and Paul are among the best players at this game and all were on target. The blues soon picked things up and began to catch up, but this was another yellow victory.

Despite being pursued by two giant shadows, Helen is not distracted during Impossiball.

Next up was another game we hadn’t played for a while, Impossiball. This is a lacrosse style game with home-made racquets that make the transition of the ball somewhat difficult to control. New girl Alex adopted a particularly entertaining method of moving the ball – dragging it behind her along the ground inside the racquet. This proved a rather effective target, and she proved a sharp shooter – scoring an excellent through the hoop goal (worth two points). Yellows however scored the winning goal.

There was time for some tossing with a tense Monkey Toss match, blessedly free of wind this week, which meant the flying monkeys flew better. This was another very close game and it all came down to the last toss. K proved that tossing monkeys is one of her few sporting talents, thus crowning Pete’s team Top Tossers and negating the need for a toss off.

Impossiball by name...

More big tennis was played to round the day off and at 6.30pm it was time to trundle home before it got dark.

On Wednesday a selection of Sillies enjoyed more indoor games at the YMCA. A newly designed missile game was followed by Unreal Tennis, involving the ball bouncing off the walls (and also involving quite a lot of ducking as the ball moves rather fast).

We also played Bouncing Volleyball, and Netball where the green team won comfortably – Helen proving once again what an excellent shot she is. Pete meanwhile proved his girlie credentials by tying with Tori as the best shooter for the red team.

The Silly Army hope a giant ice rink doesn't land on their heads.

The Silly Army will be meeting in King’s Park again from 1pm this Sunday. We will be playing Randomiser, Big Tennis, Combi Ball, Cladwhacking, Hockey, Budge, Monkey Toss and other games – come along and join us.

Apologies for the lack of blog activity last week. The Silly Army committee has been extremely hard at work organising paperwork, fighting the ice rink plans and planning a series of activities to ensure winter is far from boring – including The Silly Army Christmas Party (yay!). Details will follow in Dave’s mailout shortly.

Alex provided a great news write-up of his first experience of Wednesday games. Read it here.

 

 

 

Pete and Dave look quite the happy newlyweds in this shot, and all their friends look happy for them. All except Alan, who is clearly coveting Karen's cup of tea.

Silly Army: Return of the Machine (and Cladwhacking)

It was an historic day indeed for The Silly Army last Sunday as we saw the return of two top players who’d been missing for some weeks. Helen, aka the Score Machine, had recovered enough from her Volleyball injury to rejoin the troops for some games, and it just so happened she turned up in the middle of her specialist game, StickyBall.

Two machines: one game - StickyBall.

We also welcomed back Ras, who had been out of the country for the last month. Dodgeball just isn’t the same without his hopping, skipping and impossible dodging. It was also great to see Tori, Viv and Rob, some of our newest recruits, back for some more punishment fun; even better they had brought more new members with them.

This was probably just as well as some of the longer serving members were flagging. Barry was somewhat worse for wear after a day and night on the lager, while Chris was feeling so poorly he barely played at all. The Silly Flu also seemed to be plaguing some of the members, with K and Dave coughing and spluttering their way through the afternoon.

As is the way these days, we began with Big Tennis. The wind is certainly an advantage, or disadvantage depending on what side of the net you’re standing on, in our new court – as is the fact Pete can’t lay out an even sized court if you gave him a measuring tape. One side is always bigger than the other.

Terminator suggested swapping ends of the pitch halfway through, which certainly helped even out the scoring, but for the second week in a row we ended on one game each.

Big Tennis is The Silly Army's most popular game.

With fresh legs arriving we played Hockey, and snot-nosed K was given a real workout in the red goal. The yellow team were by far the stronger on paper, but the reds battled hard, Mike, Greg and Pete proving nifty players despite Greg being repeatedly de-sticked. Terminator, Ras and Steph were on fire for the yellows, however, and despite a valiant battle by the reds it was the yellows who won the match.

After some Dodgeball it was time for StickyBall, and the game had just got underway when the Machine turned up to lend her talents to the blue team. The fact half the blues were distracted by chatting while the yellows scored three goals in succession didn’t help the blue campaign, and the yellows seized the game quickly.

It was time for a very special tea and cake break as Mrs Doyle’s tea shop was this week accompanied by Dave’s Fantastic Bakery – a chocolate cake whipped up for Karl and Richard’s birthdays. We also had some vegan cupcakes from Mrs Doyle, so it was a very full Silly Army that took to the pitch to play CombiBall when tea break was over.

A belly full of tea and cake does not particularly complement running around chasing balls, and the greedy bunch on the blue team were soon feeling the effects of their halftime binge, the yellows with super-scoring Ras and Dave going quickly ahead.

However, the blues began to fight back with some great shooting by the Machine and impressive football goals from K and newbie Emma. The most impressive goal of the day has to be shared, however: Jez managed to boot the ball all the way from his own half into the open goal. Moments later, proving that anything a man can do a girl can do better, Steph did the same from further up the pitch. The blues were back in the game.

Sadly, despite these super shots, it was not enough to outsmart the yellow team, who won comfortably with a high goal.

How to play Tchouckball. Sort of.

A quick game of Splat enabled everyone to cool down before another old friend returned in the shape of Cladwhacking. This is a game that divides the Silly Army – you either love it or hate it. But many of the newer members gave it a go and got stuck in whacking each other with foam tubes. This time, it was the blues who were victorious.

Monkey Toss was next, again popular with those who hadn’t played it before, and becoming a real old favourite. Ras’s taunting monkey waving always entertains, and some clever diversion techniques by Pete’s team meant they were the top tossers.

Up for more running around, we played Tchouckball, a tough game as numbers were starting to drop off. The yellow team proved most successful at working the pitch, with particular skill from Terminator.

Once again we wrapped up with more Big Tennis before heading home for dinner.

The Silly Army meets every Sunday in King’s Park from 1pm. Come and join us!