Silly Army enter the magic circle

Argh, a scary rope circle! Don't get dragged in!

Despite dire forecasts of rain, Bournemouth sports club The Silly Army enjoyed a good turnout for games in King’s Park this Sunday. It was great to see some new faces; we really hope you enjoyed playing games with us and will come and join us again soon.

We gave the Monkey Toss monkeys a day off this week, but that didn’t mean the Sillies had to stand around waiting with nothing to do while we set up the pitch. Pete had been busy with felt tip pens and paper creating a Silly Bingo game (rumours that Pete is a pensioner have been greatly slightly not really exaggerated).

Everyone was given a card full of names of Silly people, some regular attendees and some rare sightings, and the objective was to cross off names as those people turned up to score a line. Silly Bingo ran for much of the session as members came and went. Rumours that the prize was “a bit crap” can’t possibly be commented on here…

Games proper began with hockey, where new players Nick and Miranda showed considerable skill, even with our silly soft ball. A hard game on a hard pitch, eventually the yellows seized victory.

Alan was busy filming us in action for the upcoming Christchurch Community Celebration and got some great action shots of dodgeball and double dodge, our second game of the day.

Argh! It's got me!!!

A clattering match of sticky ball came next, the yellow team soundly thrashing the blues by two games to nil, earning the blue team the nickname ‘Blosers’ – which was unfortunately going to dog them all day.

Crumbs and crows, the chasing game that’s the easiest way to confuse Silly Army members, ended dramatically with the entire crows side being converted to crumbs. This had never happened before and Crumbmaster Dave was unsure how to proceed – so we decided to play combi ball instead.

Several of the new players also proved very good at combi, which isn’t the easiest game to pick up. This was one of the closer contests of the day and despite a few players swapping sides during the game the blue team won a hard fought victory.

We played a few new games that involved mental and physical strength this week, one of the most entertaining of which was a ‘Circle of Death’ (or at least a circle of rope) on the ground. Everyone joined hands in a circle – aw! – but there was no love lost as the aim of the game was to drag your friends into the circle without ending up inside it yourself.

This isn’t easy, especially with sweaty hands, as you are both eliminated if you break the circle. Steph and Alex were the last two standing and agreed on a draw.

We also played a game called My View where the objective was to drag players over to your side of the line. Having been thoroughly stretched between Karl and Pete, your correspondent can confirm that she knows what being a wishbone feels like.

Pete enters the park through a portal. He can also be hired for jumping out of birthday cakes.

Much hilarity ensued when we tried to test our mental agility by playing a throwing and catching game. You were supposed to remember the order you threw and caught in, which proved just too much for most of our little brains. The throwing and catching race game proved a little easier to follow, except when the ball changed direction.

The space hoppers were out in force so we had a game of space hopper polo, in which the blues were once again trounced by the yellows, despite some valiant bouncing.

Keeping up the tradition of the day, the yellows also claimed a resounding victory in the cladwhacking. While some of the Silly Army cladwhacked, Lisa led the others in a hula hoop session, where some of Alan’s nifty moves were blamed for distracting the blue cladwhackers.

We ended the day with an improvised game of space hopper cricket, using a hockey stick in lieu of bales. Here at last the blue team shone, claiming a good, solid victory, largely down to an impressive innings from Rich and Pete.

"What, what, chaps. What is that over there?" "Well, sir, I'd say it's fun and silliness, every Sunday from 1pm."

The Silly Army meets at King’s Park, Bournemouth, every Sunday afternoon from 1pm and every Wednesday from 7pm. Come along and join us any time throughout the sessions. You’ll find us behind the playground at the Ashley Road entrance. Visit our website for more information and more detailed description of the games we like to play.

Silly Army members do it twice a week!

Dave demonstrates a new game - Monkey Toss.

It’s Wednesday. It’s cold, grey skied and raining. That can only mean one thing: Silly Summer is upon us.

The second week in May was an important one for the Silly Army as we re-launched our Wednesday evening “Silly Army Lite” games sessions. Running from 7pm to darkness and beyond, these shorter meets focus on net games and a few interesting adaptations of our Sunday repertoire. More about Silly Army Lite later; first, let’s take a look at what we got up to last Sunday.

Two magic words greeted the early arrivals at King’s Park on Sunday: Monkey Toss.

Monkey Toss was an idea dreamt up by fearless leaders Dave and Pete (who, quite frankly, spend too much time thinking about things to do with primates) while playing with a magnetic monkey one day.

They discovered that by tossing the monkey against something metal, they could achieve all manner of amusing positions. The idea quickly formulated to gather a troop of 12 magnetic monkeys, and some metal, and award points to players for the positions they achieved. Twelve sticky monkeys were quickly assembled and on Sunday the game was trialled by flinging the monkeys at Sweetpea (the world’s most beautiful, most colourful car).

This car is a babe magnet. For small, hairy, magnetic simian babes.

Testing the game proved popular – after all, who doesn’t enjoy tossing monkeys? – and resulted in Pete’s car becoming something of a babe magnet, albeit for babes with more body hair than he has…

When the serious silly games got underway, a tough game of hockey ensured that everyone was soon feeling energised knackered. This was a hard-fought and drawn out battle, eventually won by the yellow team.

Having been worn out by hockey, we opted for a few rounds of dodgeball and double dodge, where particular mention must go to new member Jamie for some spectacular dodges, including an impressive leap. Could dodgeball king Ras have found a rival for his crown?

Lining up for sticky ball.

Sticky ball followed and proved another tiring, well-contested encounter, which the blue team won two games to one.

Next came tchoukball, recently updated with the addition of two extra trampette goals to give a grand total of four. The yellow team proved best at communicating and working together to win this game.

After a short tea break, we played old favourite crumbs and crows (or is it crows and crumbs?), the game guaranteed to get everybody confused, but also sure to get everyone talking – to ask “So, are we crows, or crumbs?”

Crows and crumbs, for the uninitiated, is a chase game in which players are split into two teams, one crumbs, the other crows. When your team name is called, you run and the other team chases you. It’s a constant source of amusement how much confusion this game can cause!

How to play tchoukball, as demonstrated by our loveable leaders. Scary faces entirely compulsory when attempting to score.

After this “genteel” pastime, everyone was in the mood for a good, hard cladwhacking. Good and hard it was, too; another long game, involving lots of good-spirited combat and friendly whacking. This was won by the yellows, who comprehensively thrashed the blues.

Next it was time for a new variation on an old game; Space Invaders. Instead of two sets of cones to knock down, there were seven, each within an exclusion zone and each with one cone for the blue and one cone for the yellow team.

The yellows comprehensively won the first game, quickly adopting a team strategy. However, the blues staged a comeback in the second game after Pete started talking tactics. This was clearly the yellow team’s forte, however, and they eventually won the match.

Space Invaders proved unexpectedly tiring, so another tea break followed. We rounded off the day with a game of space hopper cricket, which once again saw individual against individual. This quickly became the Ras and Terminator show as their impressive space hopper batting saw Terminator declare at 20 runs, only for Ras to score 21. Helen also proved good at this game, while the rest of us battled it out for Golden ducks.

We reconvened on Wednesday evening for two games of hockey (won by the reds first and the yellows second), sticky ball (a yellow whitewash), and bigminton/Silly tennis (won by team Pete on both occasions).

We love to play hockey night and day.

The Silly Army meets at King’s Park, Bournemouth, every Sunday afternoon from 1pm and every Wednesday from 7pm. Come along and join us any time throughout the sessions. You’ll find us behind the playground at the Ashley Road entrance. Visit our website for more information.

We also like to go on social events and are holding a bike ride this Saturday, going from Boscombe to Corfe Castle. Contact us if you’d like to come along! Cycling up trees is entirely optional…

Pete loves bikes. Pete loves trees. So this has gotta work, right? Join us for our bike rides!

For this game, you need tea and a biscuit – English Football makes Silly Army debut

"It's really not that wet..." Duncan and Pete try to tempt Dave out to play.

Silly Army members had a busy week inventing games and building new toys in the run-up to last Sunday’s weekly games fixture.

While several club members got together for a game planning meeting, leaders of the pack Dave and Pete spent time making a set of large hula hoops. Hulaing and hula skipping races were just two of the games set to make their debut, along with a sport involving cups and saucers, tea, chocolate biscuits and ‘Excuse Me’ cards… More of which later.

So when, as we started to set up on Sunday, the heavens opened and what looked like sleet started to fall from the sky, there were rumblings of concern that not many people would turn up.

But adverse weather doesn’t stop the Silly Army.

One idea for the home made hula hoops - human hoopla.

The sleet and rain was quick to pass and while we waited for others to turn up, the early birds tested out the hula hoops, hula skipping and space hopper jousting (involving trying to knock each other off hoppers using cladwhackers).

Soon there were enough players for a game of four aside hockey and playing on a full-sized pitch meant we soon got warm. The low numbers meant everyone got a good run around and the yellow team won the first match of the day. Once again, in what is becoming a Silly Army tradition, Pete decided to swap sides halfway through the game to ensure he remained a loser.

Combi-ball was a victim of the strong wind that plagued King’s Park all afternoon, so the next game of the day was stickyball. Even here the wind posed problems, spinning the goals around and taking the balls in odd directions. Despite this, and despite Kathy entirely forgetting the rules, the blue team romped home to a comfortable victory.

"Hmm, this football is fun, but something's missing..."

After a spot of dodgeball, it was time to debut a new game, for which the aforementioned tea and biscuit were required. Christened “English Football”, this is a true gentleman’s pastime, with no running or tea spilling allowed. Each player has to carry their teacup and saucer without letting any tea spill – regular saucer checks were put in place to ensure no fouling occurred – while playing an otherwise “normal” game of football.

To ensure gentlemanly conduct reigned supreme, every player was also issued with an “Excuse me” card, which could only be played once but which, when used, meant whoever it was played on had to step aside.

"...Ah, yes, that's better." Every game of football should be played with tea.

Although it was generally agreed that this game would be more fun on a warmer day (our tea went cold) it was immensely entertaining and is sure to be added to the regular Silly Army repertoire. Once again, the blue team claimed victory.

After such a polite and dainty sport, it was only right our next game was something a little more physical. It was time to bring out the big, red tubes for cladwhacking. We hadn’t cladwhacked for a few weeks, so everyone was hungry for a bit of whacking action. Though the wind played havoc with our balls and cladwhackers, the blue team were victorious once more.

Bouncing in the face of adversity, the space hoppers came out to play once again this week, and we enjoyed a game of space hopper polo. It’s good to be able to report that there were no casualties in the hopper department this week (except Dave’s trousers…)  This game also saw the most dramatic comeback of the day. Proving this was a true blue Sunday, the blue team bounced – and we mean that literally – back from being 4-1 down to win 5-1.

A swift tea break and game of boules followed, along with some hula lessons for Kathy and Pete from hulaing experts Mimi and Steph.

For the uninitiated, this is cladwhacking in action.

There was still time for a couple more games, so we took the wind head on and played space hopper cricket, competing all against all. Pete was the clear winner, followed by Terminator second then Steph third. The rest of us failed miserably to score a single run!

We played another game of hockey, this time won by the red team and thankfully played on a shorter pitch, before it was time to pack up and head home.

Bournemouth’s Silly Army meets at King’s Park every Sunday afternoon from 1pm. Come along and join us any time throughout the afternoon. You’ll find us behind the playground at the Ashley Road entrance. Visit our website for more information.

Jumping through hoops, and eating lots of cake, at Silly Army

They're controlling that ball with the power of their minds...

The social side of the Silly Army sports and social club was out in force this weekend, as Cake Patrol went into overdrive. With chocolate cakes from Penny and ‘Terminator’ Alan, lemon drizzle from Kathy and chocolate crispies from Karl, there was more than enough cake to go around – along with the ubiquitous tea. And really, what better way is there to spend a Sunday afternoon than eating cake, drinking tea then burning it off with some extremely silly exercise?

First game of the day was sticky ball, where the supermarket giants Sainsbury’s and Tesco went head to head in the trial of the new sticky pads. Results of the test proved suitably inconclusive (in other words, all the new pads were suitably sticky) but we did particularly favour the new tiny balls, which could travel practically the length of the whole pitch.

The yellow team convincingly hammered the blues, leading to spurious claims by Pete some nameless members of the blue team that “Sticky ball doesn’t count.”

Dodgeball and double dodge followed, with much posing and being slapped in the face by large, inflatable balls.

The recently resurrected combi ball saw the dynamic combination of Ras and Karl ensuring another yellow victory, despite Helen and Kath’s valiant cheer leading efforts for the blues. Pete, however, enjoyed losing so much that he switched sides to the blue team halfway through – now there’s an example of true Silly Spirit.

Budge, the newly introduced ‘simple’ tag game that confuses everybody, turned into the ‘Make Simon run in circles’ game, and Ras again proved himself a champion chaser and chasee – even performing his classic dodgeball hop and still not getting caught.

A long and hard-fought game of hockey was won by the red team, after which it was time for tea and cake break.

The Silly Army were being filmed this week, by Alan for our website and by Mike for his journalism course. During the break Silly members old and new were interviewed on camera. It was also during the break that Karl showed off his amazing gymnastic skills by somersaulting through a combi-ball side goal. While we were wowed by his flexibility, he’d better be careful or we’ll turn this into a game!

Karl will jump through hoops for a slice of cake.

Popular demand saw the return of the space hoppers; lack of trailer space meant we had to blow them all up, turning our intermission into tea, cake and inflating break.

After the break, we tested out a new variant of tchoukball, involving four goals each with a trampoline. The verdict is still open on how well this game worked and general agreement was that it required a few tweaks to flow more smoothly. The teams had mixed around a lot but yellow was clearly the colour of the day as the yellow team again took victory.

More popular demand saw a sticky ball rematch, to give some of the late arrivals the chance to play this popular game. Everybody’s shooting seemed a little off target, perhaps because the new balls were smoother than usual, but Terminator eventually took matters into his own hands and scored the winner for the yellows.

Dreadnaught, not looking at all well as Pete takes him out for a test run.

The final game of the day was spacehopper polo, and it was in preparation for this that tragedy struck. While rounding up the hoppers, which were doing their utmost to escape, it was noticed that not only had Feck Off lost an eye, but Dreadnaught had been fatally wounded. Rather than watch him suffer an agonising death from a slow puncture, it was decided that euthanasia was by far the kindest option, and so it was that Pete vigorously pumped him until he popped.

Mike's convinced it's all going to be OK - but this isn't mouth to hopper resuscitation

After a moment’s reverence, in which a traditional Silly Army burial was eschewed in favour of resurrecting him as a carnival hat, space hopper polo rounded off the day with a final rousing yellow victory.

Despite calls for space hopper cricket, it turned out only Kathy and Terminator wanted to play, and two person cricket was never going to work. So instead, we played a fun game of ‘how the heck to we squeeze everything into the trailer’.

RIP, Dreadnaught - a moment of reflection for a fallen comrade, pumped to death (it's what he would have wanted...)

The Silly Army meets at King’s Park every Sunday afternoon from 1pm. Come along and join us any time throughout the afternoon. You’ll find us behind the playground at the Ashley Road entrance. Visit our website for more information – come on, be silly and play with us!

Sun, sea and Silly Army

Come to Silly Army. We give you hand maidens.*

OK, so maybe at King’s Park we’re a little far from the sea, but Bournemouth sports club The Silly Army made full use of the sunshine for their weekly dose of whacky sports and games last Sunday.

The Sillies were also delighted to find that the normally ubiquitous Bournemouth wind was all-but absent at the start of the afternoon, enabling us to bring out one of our favourite but underused toys, the giant frisbee.

Although there was only the slightest breeze, the unpredictable nature of the frisbee’s flightpath led to a much running around staring at the sky, quite often in the wrong direction.

Playing scramble rules (by which the first to a grounded frisbee gains possession) gave the game a real competitive edge, although scoring proved rather tricky again on account of the wind. Eventually, and with many of the older members exhausted, the blues claimed victory.

After some dodgeball and double dodge, another old favourite was reintroduced when we took to the pitch for combi ball. Combi ball, for the uninitiated, combines netball, football and three different types of goals.

Switching players around proved fatal for the blue team, who were soundly beaten by the yellows. However, the blues were quick to console themselves with some of Gemma’s delicious chocolate crispy cakes.

The gorgeous weather meant anyone who fancied a break from running around was able to sit enjoying a chat and picnic in the sunshine. Just make sure you bring plenty of water or juice with you – you’ll need it!

Next we played a game that most six year olds can master, but many of the Silly Army struggled with. Called budge, it’s a form of tag that involves standing in lines and passing a “budge” down the line to the front player, who is then chased until they reach the end of another line.

We practise our ball skills, even during tea break.

Many of the ranks were distracted from this game by a pitch invasion of what looked suspiciously like town planners intending to invade our green and pleasant land and cover it with an evil ice rink. However, after a kamikaze mission by Glorious Leader Pete, we established they were in fact quite amicable and planning a community festival.

After more refuelling, the teams took to the pitch once more for a game of sticky ball. Because of a large turnout of players and even sharp shooters Ras and Helen finding themselves off target more than usual, this was the longest sticky ball game in living memory and gave everyone the chance for a really good runaround. Eventually, the yellow team claimed victory once more.

Crumbs and crows, the chase game guaranteed to confuse everybody, was next, with additional silliness added by chasing each other while hopping like a rabbit, walking like a zombie or mincing.

We stopped again to take onboard some tea and cake while Alan 3, the only one who remembered to bring a chair, enjoyed some cake and grapes from his army of handmaidens.

Then it was time for hockey, where the yellow team unleashed their secret weapon in the shape of Robert and comprehensively won the game.

Turn those frowns upside down at Silly Army!

The last game of the day was four person tennis, in which Team Terminator unleashed their secret weapon in the shape of Pete playing his ‘Loser’s banjo’ (that’s not a euphemism) to distract the other team. The tactic worked, although many of the balls didn’t, and Team Terminator beat Team Helen two games to one.

Bournemouth’s Silly Army meets at King’s Park every Sunday afternoon from 1pm. Come along and join us any time throughout the afternoon. You’ll find us behind the playground at the Ashley Road entrance. Visit our website for more information – come on, be silly and play with us! Just make sure you bring plenty of water and sun cream if the weather is sunny.

*You won’t really get hand maidens. But you will have fun.

Silly Army hop to it

Lining up for a heat of the Hopper Grand National

And they’re off… Forget the Grand National; it was all about space hoppers this weekend as the Silly Army staged the Hopper National, the world’s least famous steeplechase, on the hallowed King’s Park turf.

The 3.30 at King’s Park was won by Pete, riding thoroughbred Tally Oh. Of this historic victory, the most successful jockey in the history of space hopper racing said… nothing, as it took too long to get his breath back.

Young blood Giles and Jez also enjoyed victories in other races, but Pete retained his crown, even proving that his expert hoppering can beat a man running the course – as Giles found to his cost. Further proof then that there is no other Silly Army member so skilled at sitting on their backside…

A man with legs; a man on a space hopper. Who will win this epic battle...

...Why the man on the hopper, of course. The Hopper King reigns eternal

The hoppers were back later in the day for a traditional English game of cricket. Using a space hopper as a bat and a fitness ball as a cricket ball, a jolly spiffing time was had by all (even though there was no tea; there was cake). Team Lisa thrashed Team Dave 32 runs to 15, largely thanks to Ras’s ability to whack the ball into the car park – even Sweetpea herself attempting to make a catch but ultimately heading the ball in the wrong direction.

Hockey was a popular choice of game on Sunday, played at the start and end of the day. The yellow team enjoyed victory in the first match, including a superbly dirty goal that involved holding down the red keeper. The reds, however, came back and won the second game using slightly cleaner tactics.

The arrival of new bibs in bright red and green caused predictable confusion and the prospect of playing sticky ball with three teams instead of the usual two, as we began the game with reds, blues and greens on the pitch. Eventually deciding on greens and reds, three tough games saw the reds claim victory, despite the fact their ‘medium’ sized bibs were more akin to oversized summer dresses on many of the players.

Cladwhacking was the usual excuse for some friendly chasing and beating each other with soft foam tubes – a Silly Army tradition – and was won by the greens, although by the end there was less clad and more whacking as we all began to beat each other with joyous abandon. When Dave made the mistake of collapsing in a heap, the game transformed into ‘Whack A Dave.’* Methinks he’ll choose his sunbathing spot more carefully in the future.

This is perhaps our strangest sport from a spectator’s perspective, as several tube wielding players gather round another who has bent over to collect the ball, ever-ready for that player to make a move so they can start whacking him/her.

It's just not cricket... (It's space hopper cricket)

We also played dodgeball, double dodge with a strange pink sausage, and resurrected space invaders – which saw another resounding victory for the green team, and a few spectacular own goals.

Making the most of the weather, Silly Army members also enjoyed some time sitting around socialising, aided and abetted by cake and cookies (special thanks to Gemma for the lemon drizzle!)

Get fat, get fit – the choice is yours. At Silly Army you can combine both.

Bournemouth’s Silly Army meets at King’s Park every Sunday afternoon from 1pm. Come along and join us any time throughout the afternoon. You’ll find us behind the playground at the Ashley Road entrance. Visit our website for more information – come on, be silly and play with us!

*Your correspondent would like to clarify that no Daves were hurt in the making of this afternoon.

Egg-cellent weather for Silly Army Easter games

He really hates line dancers... (Actually, this is our new space invaders game)

Proof, if proof was needed, that someone up there loves the Silly Army as much as we do came in the shape of unexpectedly glorious weather for games on Easter Sunday.

The sunny weather even tempted some new faces out to join in the fun and games with the Bournemouth sports club for adults, and despite a typically Bournmouthian wind adding some interesting ambiguity to frisbee games, everyone was soon enjoying themselves running around and being fabulously silly. The Silly Army is always recruiting and new bodies, or bodies who haven’t been around for a while, are always most welcome.

Easter brought out the creative side in many members as we experimented with some new ideas. The question: “What can you catch in a colander?” was swiftly given the answer “Not a ball,” as our first attempt at a new game ended in broken kitchen equipment. However, a desire by many members to play space invaders despite the one-eyed and two-eyed monsters used as targets being left at home resulted in some quick creative thinking, comedy walking and strange noise making (special kudos to Richard for excellent sound effects) in a very entertaining new game.

One of the best new inventions of late is cladwhacking, dreamt up by Dave and Pete in a moment of genius and surely destined to become an Olympic sport one day. We’ve been playing this for a month or so now and a real strategy seems to be emerging, involving tactics, distraction and wing men. It’s not just an excuse to hit each other with large foam tubes after all (although the two minute window of all-on-all whacking at the end of the day should surely become a regular fixture – it’s very therapeutic).

“A real cladwhacking strategy seems to be emerging, involving tactics, distraction and wing men”

We also played our regular fixtures of hockey – won by the yellow team – and sticky ball, along with dead ball and dodge ball. For the latter we introduced a new variant that involved all the dodgers holding hands in the centre of the circle; despite the penchant for friendly whacking we all love each other really.

After a break for a picnic of sausage rolls and chocolate monkey cake cooked up by a couple of Sillies, it was time to unleash the space hoppers for a game of hopper polo. Cries of “Tally oh!” echoed across King’s Park in a hard-fought battle that saw several unplanned dismountings and one casualty as a hopper sacrificed himself for the cause, exploding with a loud pop and unceremoniously depositing his rider on the grass. The rider was unharmed, the hopper’s injuries alas proved fatal.

“Cries of ‘Tally oh!’ echoed across King’s Park in a hard-fought battle”

After a hard day's hopper catching, Pete surveys his captives

We battled the wind to play frisbee, which saw the yellows win again despite the blues’ (over)confidence. Because the weather was so lovely, we didn’t want to go home too soon, so played a few games of ‘Ras ball’ (a throwing/catching/name calling game named after Ras, who invented it) with our large, inflatable pink sausage.

Some of the Silly Army members also got together on bank holiday Monday for an unofficial bike ride in the New Forest. The sun shone on us once more, to the point where the fairer skinned got a little sunburnt, and we enjoyed a leisurely ride through the forest, complete with two tea and cake stops and some time for messing about in the river – what better way to spend your bank holiday? The fact our fearless leader also discovered he could drive his trailer with the wheelclamp on is probably best glossed over…

The Silly Army meets at King’s Park at 1pm every Sunday, and is always keen to recruit new members. We also have a good social scene (and really like tea and cake). Come along and play with us – you’ll find us behind the children’s playground at the Ashley Road entrance.

Visit our website for more information, or contact us.

Playing away all weekend

That's just not cricket - no really, it isn't. It's cladwhacking and it's great fun.

The last weekend of March was a very Silly one indeed for the Silly Army faithful, many of whom started playing on Friday evening and didn’t stop until Sunday afternoon.

As well as the weekly games at Kings Park, the Silly Army enjoy a great social scene and like nothing more than meeting regularly to shoot each other – what better way to spend your Friday evening? We’re talking, of course, about LaserQuest, an occasional fixture in the Silly calendar. Joining forces with members of The Improvables drama group, the Sillies enjoyed three rounds of ‘friendly’ fire – the highlight of the night for many seeing esteemed leader Pete get beaten by a girl. Twice.

Saturday saw a trip to Hengistbury Head for a birthday celebration and more games, including good old fashioned British bulldog and not quite so traditional (but just as good) pig rounders. Like many Silly Army games, pig rounders evolved from the need to have something to play with. After the rounders ball disintegrated following some particularly vigorous whacking, it was almost time for tantrums as we wondered how to finish the game.

Luckily, the squeezy pig that had been acting as a base stepped in and bravely sacrificed himself for the cause, losing his squeaker and stuffing in the process, but allowing us to play on. The game was finished and the tantrums saved for the dog that weed on our ball bag (enough to make anyone angry).

After this, we played the sitting down and eating chocolate cake game, a particular favourite of mine.

Many Sillies reconvened for board games a few hours later, involving eating a lot more chocolate cake, lying on the floor and contorting each other into strange positions.

Heavy rain was forecast for Sunday afternoon, but Mother Nature smiled on the Silly Army once more as the showers stayed off until the last games of the day. Being able to use two pitches was a real bonus as it enabled us to spread our games out more, and a small but dedicated few met to play a range of net and field games.

We kicked off with a game of frisbee volleyball, quite a challenge in the wind. Hockey – played on an extra-long pitch – was a close-fought affair, eventually won by the reds.

Dodgeball was followed by a vigorous sticky ball contest, won by the yellow team despite Lisa’s vision of a blue victory. A slower game of dead ball always brings out the wicked side of the Sillies as they decide which of their friends to knock the arms and legs off, and a final runaround of cladwhacking saw the strain of three days solid of playing starting to take its toll on some of the older members.

The last net game of the day, a kind of four person tennis, saw Dave’s team soundly thrash Pete’s team and order was restored in the world once more (not that I’m biased).

The Silly Army meets at Kings Park every Sunday afternoon, on the pitches opposite the pavilion. Click here to contact us, and come along to play with us soon!

Come rain, come shine, come have a Silly time…

One of our slower games, the facial hair growing contest. These two have been here since 1912.

Despite the hideous weather of Friday and Saturday, sun shone on Kings Park last Sunday and the Silly Army basked in its shiny glory for more crazily sporty (or should that be sportily crazy?) fun and games.

The Boscombe Monsoon of the preceding two days may have been partially responsible for the lower than expected turnout, but there were still plenty of willing victims players for a series of fun games.

We kicked off with a good, hard cladwhacking, with a few tweaks to the rules in an attempt to prevent an all out whack-fest like we saw last week. It worked and the game flowed more smoothly, although I’m pleased to report there was still plenty of opportunity to beat your friends with a large tube. Once again the yellow team hammered the blue team, which is becoming something of a Silly Army tradition.

Dodgeball gave your corespondent her moment of glory by successfully knocking over one of the esteemed leaders, while Ras amused everybody by performing a daredevil hop – only to eliminate himself by hopping out of the circle before a ball had been thrown.

The blue team staged a shocking comeback in the next game, stickyball, thanks to great team work and Helen’s sharp shooting. We then played deadball, a kind of sadist’s dodgeball that involves all against all in an attempt to knock off opponents’ arms and legs before eventually killing them (all of these metaphorical, of course). Mike proved so good at this game that I believe he’s still up there bouncing around that circle now…

Hockey was up next and the reds staged a valiant comeback, but sharp shooter Steph and the rest of the yellows took the glory. There was just time for some spacehopper polo before everybody’s legs gave out and hometime once again came far too soon.

Come rain, come shine, come invasion of evil space robots, you’ll always find the Silly Army at King’s Park on Sunday afternoons. Come along and join us – you’re guaranteed to smile.

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Welcome! A Silly blog for Silly people

Come join the fearless troops of the Silly Army. Being hit by something large, pink and inflatable has never been so much fun. See more pics in our gallery.

Hello and welcome to the new Silly Army blog, where you’ll find match reports and a round-up of what’s been going on at Bournemouth’s Silly Army. At least, the bits we can remember. And the bits we’re allowed by law to repeat.

Last weekend saw a sure sign that Spring is almost upon us – the spacehoppers have come out of hibernation. After their long winter sleep, some of the hoppers were feeling a bit deflated, but after some tender loving air from Pete and new recruit Mike they were full of bounce once more, and so were the Silly Army ranks as they bounced around Kings Park with gay abandon in a game of spacehopper tag.

There can’t be anything more fun than bouncing about on something giant, inflatable and preferably pink. From the way my thighs felt on Monday it’s a darn good workout too.  Let’s hope we see more of these shy and retiring creatures in the near future!

Sunday also saw the grand unveiling of a great new game by Dodgeball Dave. Cladwhacking (code name unrepeatable) involves picking up and transporting balls in long plastic tubes – made out of what look like rolled-up yoga mats. This is a surprisingly hard task to master and I for one will never again mock an elephant – it’s not easy to pick things up in a long, red protuberance. That, and the sheer unpredictability of where your balls will land, is what makes this game highly entertaining.

Cladwhacking was filmed by a pair of students from Bournemouth University, who also interviewed Dave and some members. Who knows, Silly Army antics could yet become a YouTube hit…

We also enjoyed the world’s fastest game of sticky ball, in which the Yellow team soundly thrashed the Blues. It was a real blink-and-you’ll-miss-it affair; looking back that may have been the problem for us Blues – I blinked and missed the ball.

The Blues almost staged a dramatic comeback in combiball, but ultimately decided they preferred another spanking and the sweet taste of defeat, and the Yellows reigned victorious once more. Other games played included hockey, dodgeball and crumbs and crows (guaranteed to confuse everyone!). All in all, an immensely enjoyable way to spend your Sunday afternoon, and get some exercise without really noticing you’re doing it.

Remember, The Silly Army needs you. Come join in the craziness. We meet every Sunday in Kings Park at 1pm on the football pitches opposite the pavilion. We play loads of games including dodgeball, hockey, spacehopper polo, combiball and monkey chase,* plus many more, and the brains behind operation are constantly inventing new things to play.

Get in touch for more information and to find out what we’ll be up to this weekend.

*One day I’ll find out what monkey chase is.